Marriage involves sacrifice. What kind? That’s what we’re talking about today on Next Steps.
Hey there, I’m Elliott, one of the ministers at Swiss Cove Christian Church. Welcome to our channel, where our goal is to help you take your next step of faith. We hope you find this helpful. If you do, like and subscribe for more videos like this one!
And they all lived happily ever after. It’s how the movies end right? Marriage is amazing, especially if you’ve chosen well. Right up front, I’d like to say this: I wouldn’t trade one day of being married for a thousand days of being single.
That being said, before you get married, you need to understand there are some things you’re going to have to give up to be married. You have to answer this question: Are you ready for that?
Here are 10 things you have to give up to get married.
1. Eating whatever you want
The days of coming home and throwing a Totino’s frozen pizza in really quick are probably over. There are some things you love that your spouse won’t love. Guess what that means? You won’t necessarily have to cut them out, but I promise you won’t be eating things you love that your spouse doesn’t often.
2. Financial independence
Any time two bank accounts become one bank account, things change. You will now be accountable to each other for the way you spend money. You can’t just drop money spur of the moment because you felt like it. There is now someone else to consider when it comes to finances.
3. Alone time with the opposite sex
Maybe you have a ton of friends that are the opposite sex. Once you’re married, alone time with them goes away. It’s not appropriate for me to spend time with my female friends one on one now that I’m married. Is that fair? It doesn’t matter. The marriage comes first.
4. Spontaneity with friends
The days of being totally free with your schedule are out the window. The days of people just calling spur of the moment and you heading off on an adventure are pretty much done. Not that your spouse won’t let you go have fun with your friends, but you SHOULD be checking in with them before you head out the door.
When you share a bathroom with someone, your privacy goes out the window. Married people share bedrooms, bathrooms, pretty much everything but clothes. So get used to it.
You don’t get to keep secrets from your spouse. Well, except for maybe the location of your next date! Communication is vital for a marriage to thrive, so secrets between spouses shouldn’t be the norm.
7. Levels of friendship
Who is your best friend right now? Maybe you’re about to marry them, and that’s fantastic. But your relationships with the rest of your friends are about to change dramatically. It’s not that you won’t talk to them or be friends with them. But your spouse is about to be the number one priority as far as people are concerned. Your friends will notice, and they will treat you differently.
8. Your ability to back out
Marriage is “till death do us part.” I understand it is possible to end a marriage (and that there are valid circumstances that warrant that), but if you want your marriage to thrive, you’ve got to take that off the table from the beginning. You can’t go into marriage with even a thought that it won’t last. We don’t even use the D-Word (divorce) in our house. It’s not a joke, it’s not leverage. We’re in it forever, and you should be too.
9. Your immediate family.
I know it sounds blasphemous. I’m not saying you’re going to cut off ties with your parents and siblings. But you have to understand something before you get married. Once you’re married, your parents and siblings are no longer your immediate family. YOUR SPOUSE IS. Your relationship with them should and must change. They will no longer be your go-to people, your spouse fills that role in your life.
10. Your heart.
I know this is the gushy part. But if you’re heart isn’t in it, it won’t last. You’ve got to be all in. You’ve got to trust this person completely. You’ve got to decide you will love them even when you don’t like them. You’ve got to give them your heart.
What did I miss? I’d love to hear your thoughts. Leave them in the comments below!
Always remember, we love you, we’re praying for you, and we’re in this together. We’ll see you next week.